Did The flintstones Wear Underwear?

My oldest boy asked me the other day, "Daddy, did the Flintstones wear underwear?" That didn't bother me. what bothered me was, I had to think about it. I had to think long and hard. I ended up saying, "Yes, of course they did." but actually they didn't. Underwear hadn't been invented yet. Unless it was underwear made of stone and by definition that is horribly uncomfortable. But I said yes because I didn't want him going to school the next day, dropping his pants in front of everyone and going, "Look, I'm not wearing any underwear - just like the Flintstones.

I told my two boys I would never lie to them, but in times like these, little white lies are okay, I have learned.

My Youngest Boy Is Now Four

My youngest boy turned four years old on January 24th. They grow up so fast. He still hugs me every night and tells me he loves me and now when my oldest boy hits him he hits back. They love each other, they just have a strange way of showing it.

We gave him a batman cake. He ate all the icing and left the cake. I used to do that too. We're taking my two boys to their first concert next week, the Buddy Holly Tribute Show. That will be a blast.

Rock on boys, just like your daddy. You're never too old to Rock-N-Roll

The Mini Vacation

So the family took a mini vacatiion to Myrtle Beach over the weekend. Vacations are a time to relax and get over the stress in your life, right? Wrong. The resort we were going to was advertised at the end of 52nd street. Only thing is, there are like three 52nd streets in Myrtle Beach. Whoever came up with this idea should be fired immediately.

We went around in circles for about two hours looking for the resort. When we found it there were cars all the way around the block waiting to check in. The place was full to capacity. We got our key and then we couldn't find the room because they sent us to the wrong building. When we did finally find the room, the key wouldn't work.

I teach stress management so at this point I'm trying to practice what I preach. It's not working. This is just one of those days where nothing is going to go right.

The resort had an indoor pool and water slide and hot jaccuzzis and all kinds of things for the kids to play on. the only problem is, there were too many kids there. So no one had any fun. Every pool was full, the water slide was full every jaccuzzi was full, ever chair was taken, we couldn't enjoy it.

I was so glad to get back home and relax in front of the TV and watch football. There's no place like home. I don't think I'm going back to Myrtle Beach ever again. It's getting way too big to enjoy anymore.

Maybe I'll go to Atlantic Beach, NC or Carolina Beach. They're still small enough to enjoy and not stress you out.

Oh, thank God for Valium.

Christmas With The Kids

If you don't have children then you don't have any idea just how exciting Christmas Day can be. The look on their faces when they saw the presents under the tree was utopia.

I put one of the gifts outside on the porch and told my oldest boy that Santa's bag must have ripped open and a present fell out. He believed it. That's all that matters. I got a feeling this is going to become a Christmas tradition around the BC house every year.

I did it last year and this year he comes up to me and says, "We have to look on the porch this year to see if Santa's bag bust open."

They got way too much stuff. Grandma gave them each a toy cell phone. I told Austin when he's old enough to get a job he can get his own cell phone and he can pay fot it. I figure that's fair.

I didn't understand what Christmas was all about until I had children. Now it's all so simple.

And, by the way, our favorite holiday movie to watch together is "Polar Express." A great movie for the entire family. We've watched it about 10 times already.

Happy (After) Thanksgiving

It's finally over. Now all the parents in America can go to the mall and fight over great deals. I've been there. I've seen it. Normal, everyday, decent people fighting and cussing each other to get the last hot toy for their child.

Fighting over the hottest toy that will end up in the toy box never to be played with again in just two days. I don't know what the hot toy is this year. I remember when it was Elmo. Everyone had to have an Elmo for their child. Where is that Elmo now. Any idea. How about the Beenie Babies? The Cabbage Patch Kids?

Whatever it is this year, you can bet on one thing, it was made in China and it's not healthy for your child. But why do parents buy it. To save a couple of dollars. Is the health of your child worth it?

Mine isn't. That's why I'm buying toys made in America. They're safe, they're cool and they're fun to play with. Sure, they cost a little more. So I just won't buy my boys as much this year. But the things I do buy them will be safe and they won't be made in China.

I urge you to do the same. Aren't your kids worth it?

A Changed Man

Before my first son was born I did drugs, smoked pot and drinked myself into oblivion. It came with the territory. i was a professional comedian and worked in bars every night. It was there and i did it. When my son came along I realized that if I was to raise him right, I had to get right first. So I gave up my career and the drugs and pot and alcohol and I became a changed man.

I thought I had gotten rid of all my pot stuff like the bongs and roach clips and pin s and t-shirts and stuff, but my son, who is now six, found a pin that I still had with the words, "A friend with weed is a friend indeed" on it. So he put it on his shirt and wore it to school like a sheriff's badge. And he got sent to the principal’s office. She called me and said if I wanted the pin I could come to school and get it.

I declined, of course. I just told her that she could have it or throw it away. Now I’m searching the house for every little thing I can find that relates to pot. After all, I’m on the PTA board. I don’t need this kind of crap in my life.